Date: 27th Sept., 2010
Was it the reputation of the Hare for a great Hash run, the whisper of a great nosh, the location of down town Labrador or the chance to win a six pack of German piss that enticed 35 runners to turn up for Latrine’s hash on steroids??
War and peace had nothing on the list of instructions, building the harbour bridge was a snap compared to the logistics and ‘a la carte in the park was a breeze compared to the 5 course nosh. Latrine was always going to deliver 100% hash and he sure did!!
Gathered in the park opposite the Latrine lounge were the expectant 35 runners waiting patiently for the “A” “B” and “C” instructions. Noticed in this group was our R/A Cumsmoke and Sir AH in deep conversation …….. now what do I do with the roller again AH ?? Cumsmoke says … I will need more help later OK it’s a big job and I don’t want to fuck it up!!!
Off into the wilds head the pack with Latrine announcing right on the start whistle that the pack will be back at 8.15 YES 8 (Eight) 15 that’s two hours away. Look for the drink stop and introduce yourself to “Movie-star” to get a cold drink on the way through, look out for hats and Buddas along the way and earn yourself a six pack.
Sure enough the logistics got out of hand as some of the pack got lost ( or quit) heading back to the drink stop and gather in the park. Finally the Swollen ambulance delivered back the “A” to “B” crew at 8.10 pm. The emergency pick up machine went out to gather Movie-star and Swollen with the half full esky … even if it was his ambulance Latrine had bigger things on his mind …. 5 course nosh had poor Swollen way back in the memory bank.
It’s now 8.45 and the nosh is rolling out with our hare doing laps back to the Latrine kitchen in record time, smoked Salmon Canapes with Capers and then quiche Lorraine followed by palate cleansing watermelon pieces with fresh banana. On to main course ….. Chilli Con Carne over rice with garden salad followed by fresh fruit salad. WOW and all that inside budget!!!!!!!!!! THAT’S the TRUTH!!
9.10pm Circle is called.
This week’s sponsor is “Missing Link Lounges” with a most attractive advertising promotion of self indulgence from Link …. seems his sales pitch is “they feel great on your bare arse” or other bits in the same region!!
The Hare is first up……..
Caustic claims to have covered the ‘A”-“B” run and calls it as the best hash run in a VERY long time …. long being the operative word…. seems he went to the Parkwood water tower via Beenleigh. Latrine gets the “Clap” for a great effort!! Bent Banana claimed a twisted ankle and Rug picked up the prize of six German beers for looking up and spotting the hat while all the taller people were ducking under the branches. Swollen found the Budda ( likes attract) Rabbit and Caustic also claimed the same prize with two Buddas Latrine will adjudicate. Swollen gives a note!
Swollen then gives a nosh report and claims the chilli was a “bit too hot” for his delicate palate giving the nosh a VERY harsh score of 7.9/10
GM claimed no fruit salad ………. perhaps that was coz he was back for the third helping of main course????
Old Fart gives a note!!
Botcho with Bali belly, Bent Banana back from his 1st class trip with graft for the GM. Stubby been busy for the last six months making billions for the bank. Arse up took 4 months to get back from interhash. Dicky Knee accused of says nasty things about the GM and claimed being a 4 schooner piss pot and not driving the GM
Rockhard gives a note!
Mirco from Switzerland , Chris and Sean from Melbourne are all guests of Caustic.
Movie (porn) star is a guest of Latrine Lounge Inc.
Caustic gives a note to the dulcet tones of Edelweiss.
LEAVING O/S … Rockhard on the 12th October …. More later!! See him on the last night at our Octoberfest run NOT TO BE MISSED!!!!
R/A is called arriving NAKED of his papal robes of office.
Charges are called for …….. Swollen claims 3 goals in on the AFL should NOT transfer to double or nothing at SIX goals in …. pays the R/A $10 and calls it quits.
Swollen is back again charging the hare wit totally forgetting him and Moviestar with the heavy esky.
Sir Rabbit is charged with not fronting with the birthday Crownies by Latine …….. Sir Rabbit uses his powers as minister for trivial charges and escapes the ice (for now)
KB is charged by Ferret for “the worst scene in hash in many years” …. using the 4×4 to attend the drink stop!!! Poor Ferret has been miss informed and did not realise the on sec had to transport the poor GM who has a reoccurring hash injury that even stopped him from doing the walk, other members went along to support the GM. KB somehow escapes the ice when the R/A finds a rare moment of compassion.
POW Latrine now gives a 15 minute charge for the next POW!!!
Starting with the hierarchy…..
GM can’t run, KB needed a fill in for the words(Latrine) Caustic no respect for the dick operation of Latrine. Cumagen for NO kegs for weeks. Missing Link for squatting at a fellow hash house.
However he has a MUCH better target ……. (I will try to cover the story as best I can )
The tale started with the splinter lunch and a $50 bottle of wine that Latrine took to give to Sir Slab … the new POW spotted it and said I’ll just have a sip to try it coz I’m driving ….. One full bottle of red later our POW has abandoned driving, designated Latrine to drive and is on a missing to get totally smashed.
Departure from Hooters was some $50 later for our POW and Ferret, then out to the car park for driving lessons for the resident yank ( Quote Yanks can’t drive in Australia) our new POW then proceeds to show Latrine how to get the car out and prangs it!!! Onward to Sir Prince’s place to proceed to burn EVERY Brownie point he has in one visit, urinate in the pool was even mentioned.
( Caustic and Swollen suggest the sun is coming up !!! Latrine is only half way through)
7PM the new POW’s phone rings and he is not capable of answering it so Latrine answers “Dr Andrews emergency ward” Gold Coast hospital. Seems Mrs New POW was not impressed. Latrine says OK I’ll drop you off home if you can promise me Mrs New POW is not there ………. “It’s OK she’s not there” ……….WRONG !!!!
Finally completing a hash run with an umbrella last week topped it off for our new POW !!
Front and centre …POW RUG
Latrine gives a note and Rug drops the POW glass in two gulps (equal second)
Next week’s run Arse up/VD
Swollen claims a new sex position…. sure to catch on our west!!
Circle closed just before sunrise.
A great night in hash!!