Date: 8 th October 2018…………………………
Well after being chucked in the deep end last week, our esteemed GM Weekly grabbed me by the ankles and held my head underwater until I agreed to write the run report again. God help me I pray for the return of FA to get me out of this.
Circle opened at exactly 8.00pm. Weekly being a stickler for doing things by hours and half hours perhaps from some childhood fetish of sitting on the potty at set times. Weekly was without his signature cigar, he looked like a dehorned rhino, in fact he resembles that more than Churchill.
First up he called for returning runners and three stepped forward with dry tongues for a freebie –
- S Bends returned from a luxury cruise from north America to Japan,
- VD from the epic Iberian Peninsula Shathouse bike ride
- Swollen Colon, not sure where he returned from, probably the City All got down downs.
- Arsenik called up for ten runs and given a 10 run T shirt. Does that mean those with 1,000 runs get 100 T shirts ??? Link gave him a note
Now Loved was pouring the down down drinks, he must be a “Trusty” of S Bends
We sat down to eat ,I happened to sit next to Hardon, I can assure you all that I did hear him breathing, well I think I did, so he remains above ground level for the time being. But saw him Wednesday and he informed me that next day he was ill from food contamination !!
KB gave a note for Sweat Hog’s down down for $200,000 raised on his recent outback epic journey where he traded Gold Coast beach sand for desert red sand. Well done RA.
Brew master S Bends gave a description of the special beer for the night – Chinese “Lucky Beer” to commerce the Long walk when Mao took power there.
Botcho reported on the run as “Fantastic went this way and that way over the railway line” – he can’t tell a train from a tram – Blackie and Bent Banana were mentioned as runners of note.
Caustic C gave the walk report as “being in the moonlight , so torches were not necessary – how romantic. Foxtrot gave a note for the Hare, but as it was a bit weak, the heavy guns were called in Jigsaw! He sang like Pavarotti in opera – missed his calling in life
KB gave the food report saying that it was not from a noodle box, well how about that! – was that all he could think of ?? Well actually the burgers were from a bygone era – with beetroot and tinned pine apple they reminded me of my callow youth scoffing down a late night hamburger after failing to win a chick at the Saturday night dance in Launceston. I usually ended up with red beet stain over my white shirt, which I wore with a narrow tie, reefer jacket and brown suede shoes, I thought I was another Errol Flynn. But a bit more history here – The hare Missing Link was in the same class at Launceston High as my brother Layup (Brisbane hash). Layup tells me that The Link was the most successful guy at seducing high school chicks and that he never missed out, much to the envy of the rest, who never made it. So the name Missing Link is not appropriate it should be Lucky Link, or perhaps Pants Man Link – hash renaming here.
The Ra Sweat Hog called from noms from the floor. Botcho called Blackie for getting on the tram with no go card- probably does not have one and if caught would plead senility
KB called up Caustic C for buying a new car from a Honda dealer – KB seems to think he has a Hash Monopoly.
B Banana called out Rabbit for a fishing trip with only one fish caught – worked out at $800 per Kg.
S Hog then acted like a stand up comic at an RSL bingo night, told a few corny jokes one about a NZ horse that talked, reminded me of those old Ed The Talking horse movies we kids loved.
Swollen Colon achieved 150 runs. He was called out and with that ridiculous beanie, resembled a rotund garden gnome. After slipping his cap on he was transformed like the prince in a fairy tale in to a hashman..
KB in his office of Chief Inspector of Hash attire – warned all they they must be dressed in Hashoween attire for the Hashoween run, otherwise they will be sent home in disgrace.
At the end of the night Pants Man Link offered the left over pineapple and beetroot but there were no takers. I assume he took it home, put it in the freezer to bring out as nosh on his next run – – did all the hamburgers get eaten ???? – So beware !
Gm Weekly called on Foxtrot to end circle, but he gave a very weak rendition of Me me me me me hardly audible except for those hashmen with hearing aids ( a few now I believe). He was corrected by the Gm and circle ended at 8.37 pm.
Winston Churchill quote for the week – –
Life can either be accepted or changed. If it is not accepted, it must be changed. If it cannot be changed, then it must be accepted
Acing scribe Brengun