Date : 17th September 2012
Hare : Veteran
Venue : Norm Rix Park, Labrador
Woche auf Deutsch Extravaganz – zwei
With the bureau forecasting showers there were a surprising number of attendees waiting at the venue. I was warned to expect an award before the end of the evening by many hashers; apparently I have been making some heightist jokes at the expense of Mohamed El-Critchley Mahmood (Flasher as we know him). What a load of sh#t he needs to grow a set (and about two feet)
Instructions issued by the hare, Veteran and we were off eastwards into the familiar territory that is Labrador. Which reminds me why does Flasher always laugh when he runs? Because the grass tickles his nuts.
Pile Driver has definitely fallen out with the wife; this is now the sixth week in a row he has attended.
The route was well marked and contained plenty of checks, check-backs and false trails. Whilst predominantly on paths there was a little grass and bush. Some markings were hard to locate but that, combined with the checks and route, ensured the pack was kept together for a large amount of the run. The walkers were cleverly orchestrated on and off our path leaving me with a feeling of De Ja Vu as I ran past Show Pony and others continually.
The pack bunched up again near government road with Bent Banana suddenly putting down the anchor, Flasher was coming to a stop when he got rear-ended by Miscarriage. Flasher turned and said, “I am not happy.” Miscarriage replied, “Well then which dwarf are you?”
I could do this all night!.
A little light on distance meant that the front-runners returned back a shade over thirty minutes, almost the same time as the walkers. A good effort by most meant that there was about seven or eight at the pointy end of the pack. Nice finish by Cum Smoke and Josephine.
Entrees were served, good quality dipping chips in abundance (when was the last time you saw left overs) with a tomato salsa. The mains were a Mexican/Italian combination probably best named Chilli Rigatoni, it was hot tasty and just enough to feed everyone. Fruit and ice cream served as dessert.
Circle was called, several times, little respect being shown for the GM with the RA not icing anyone again
I departed to help a ‘damsel in distress’, to find a fat bloke with a beard and a flat battery (can someone point out an opticians to Moonbeams please)
Meanwhile, the Hare was being lambasted by the sh&t stirring Caustic Crusader “East Labrador is better than west but – Labrador is still Labrador” 5.9/10
Crocodile was less kind of the walk – “Lacked imagination 2/10
PV (?) said of the food “old army recipe from the Boer War” 5/10
Visitors – Hemorrhoids
Returners – Arse up, Testicles and Dicky Knee
Shat sent his apologies but it seems the weak b%st^rd has fallen over whilst pissed again, Kwakka with bad knee (but able to motorcycle at the weekend) and Blackie was earning a coin flogging condoms and penis extensions.
RA spotlight fell on Cum Smoke – our resident seagull (others preferred Ibis) for not finishing the dipping chips, DD for him and Caustic, heard to be whining about the length of time circle was taking but giving a passable ussain bolt impersonation on hearing free crownies were in the offing.
Point Two is very healthy and relaxed according to Josephine, who is worried his own property will be reminiscent of a reptile house thanks to Point two’s snake repulsion equipment. (could we purchase one for Caustic)
Kitchen Bitch brown nosed the GM with a return from holiday pressy (which was actually worth having) an ice cold Bintang.
Miscarriage attempted a prostrate cancer examination drive but it sounded more like [email protected] to me.
Jokes – Iceman broke the stigma of gold coasts worst joke teller with a contemporary view of current events and Testicles had everyone chuckling over a Kebab.
POW – worst kept secret since he came out of the closet, Flasher attempted a lame ruse before presenting the award to Rectum. At least there was more to it than voting Labour. In the spirit of keeping it a secret, the first hasher to make a CAUSTIC comment will be getting it next week.
Hashy birthday to Botcho and Sir Rabbit who both brought crownies unlike you Show Pony.
DD for Sir Slab for trailer savings and Sir Prince giving us his three word wedding speech? (someone suggested the translation was “wrong f#ck*ng hole”)
Next weeks run Truck Tyres @ Burleigh
End of circle pre-empted by Moonbeams
Thanks to Veteran for his efforts on the run and food, bear in mind when you slag him off, he did the food by himself and kept the pack together on the run. Not everybody does.
Most of the above may be untrue. But I don’t care.
So Rectum reckons that the grass tickles Flasher’s nuts and makes him laugh. What I would like to know is how come Rectum knows that Flasher doesn’t wears jocks?
One sunny afternoon, three old women were sitting on a bench in the park when Flasher suddenly came by and flashed them.
The first old woman had a stroke, the second old woman had a stroke, and the third old woman couldn’t reach that far!!
I too have met Flasher and found him to be a good bloke, although I must admit he is very small for a grown-up , but it is true he does have a very big heart. Does anyone have contact details for him, clearly he has had a penis extension because I remember it being tiny but I would love to meet the surgeon. You boys over there seem to have a great crack and the hash trash is hilarious. Keep it up.
on on F. M.
I came across this web site by chance and I’m absolutely horrified by the way you treat my good friend and running mate Flasher…..
Short he might be, but he has a huge heart and, so the locals tell me, a huge Penis.
He loves to visit the Mosque and is often seen on his hands and knees (usually when leaving the Hot Spot night club in Subic Bay)….praying.
Leave him alone and treat him with great respect…he deserves it.