Hares: Sir Slab & Sir Prince
A COLOSSAL NIGHT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!…..44….yes, you read right…44 runners and walkers tonight!!!…enough to send our hares and the booze-masters into a tailspin even before the run had begun…….“Shit, we’ve only got 64 beers and 10 ciders…I’ll have to go to the pub and buy more grog!” exclaimed Weekly as the Hashers just kept on rolling in for the night. They came from far and wide tonight and a great number of our own decided to also turn up…the latter probably realising that they’d better get their ten runs in so that they can go to the AGPU for the discounted rate!!
At the start of the night I noted these significant attendees…Arse Up, Show Pony, Moonbeams, Dicky Knee and our Melbourne visitors Phantom II, PolPot, Happy and Big Steve, and of course, let’s not forget Sir Botcho’s much better looking brother, Vomit.
The hares tonight were Sir Slabb and Sir Prince Valiant and this was a typical great run set by Sir Slabb…starting from the soccer fields off Ron Penhaligon Way at Robina and winding its way through bush, parks, down pedestrian pathways, and suburbia, which in the dark all looks the bloody same, leading some of us to wonder at times “where the fuck are we??”. Your truly decided that he could cope with the run tonight and it turned out to be quite challenging in parts, but very well marked (apart from when a whole heap of us got lost when we came out of suburbia out onto the Robina Parkway), but other than that, excellent world-class markings. The checks were great in keeping us all bunched up and I even detected that Flasher stayed the course rather than doing what he normally does, which is making it up as he goes along.
According to my “Map My Walk” app on my phone, the run was 5.93 km in length, with which some of the others who measure the run electronically agreed to be roughly right.
As we meandered through suburban Robina, several residents came out and one woman was heard to comment…”it’s just a bunch of silly old blokes running around, I thought somebody was being chased and beaten up!”…to the uninitiated we must seem like a weird lot…a bunch of enthusiastic senior types, racing around yelling “on on”, “are you”, “on left”, “on right”, “checking”, “on back” and other such nonsense. I am sure we would all agree that it is their loss and “fuck ‘em!” if they have a problem with us.
Sir Blackstump almost did himself a disastrous injury when he was trying to overtake some of the slower runners, yelling “serious runner coming through!” as he pushed and shoved his way through….not noticing the wooden bollard directly in front of him…lucky he was not about two inches lower in his vital areas as he might have really bashed ‘em hard…as it was it appears that there was just sufficient clearance for no real harm to be done.
In all a great run…and it was great to see shitloads of us out there!
Starters this week was AGAIN definitely left overs from the Boonah weekend…but what leftovers they were!! Unlike last week, where we were served up some lovely slices of ham, this week we got served up some fried spring rolls, very kindly served to us by Hard On…if your pencils all go blunt you can always become a waiter Hard On!! They were indeed a nice treat, with lots of dipping soy sauce available.
There were also cheese and crackers available in a large platter and the cheese disappeared awfully quickly I noticed.
Mains was sausages, bacon and onion, either served on rolls or for those of us attempting to maintain the SRS diet, dished up on our plates without the added carbs. Of course there were the usual detractors and whingers, particularly notable being Moonbeams who said “I told Boo I had to go to Hash tonight as I was looking forward to a nice meal, probably two or three curries to choose from and I get a banger in a roll?? I thought this was supposed to be the gourmet hash??”…oh well, can’t please everybody, can you?? I certainly enjoyed it, but I gotta say…you all missed a fine nosh if you didn’t come last week for my Spanish meatballs done to my mother’s recipe!!
Dessert was same as last week (Sir Prince, how many fucking bananas did you buy for Boonah???)…yep, fried bananas with ice cream!
Given that there were 44 of us tonight, this was probably an appropriate menu as we would surely not have had sufficient curry or other specialty dish for this number of people….I don’t know about the rest of you, but I generally cater for around 30 in my noshes.
Circle commenced with the GM bringing out Sir Slabb and Sir Prince Valiant as the hares…a well deserved down down for a great effort tonight boys…and Slabb, your sweeping of the trail as we progressed was much appreciated. Truckie was asked for his opinion of the run…he babbled on and on and the only sensible thing he said was that it was….wait for it…AMAZING!!
Superlatives kept on spewing forth, this time from the GM who commended Sir Slabb on the sweeping which I have already described…..EXCELLENT!!
Yet more superlatives were to come…Slug described the walk as being none other than….AMAZING!!….this is just getting too much!!
Moonbeams, who had been detected whinging incessantly about the nosh, was therefore asked to provide an assessment thereof….”I’m fucking worse than shat off…I saw the breakfast at Boonah and this is what was fucking left!!”
Moving onto the RA’s spot…he called out our visitors from Melbourne…the four that I have already mentioned above, so you’ll just have to scroll back up to see who they were…and then came the returning runners, Dicky Knee, Arse Up and ShowPony…apparently Dicky has come off 18 months of night shift so we should be seeing him more regularly.
Swindler called Truckie out the front…my notes and memory fail me, but the fact that Truckie has committed some kind of misdemeanour is hardly surprising!!
Vomit, brother of Sir Botcho is going back to Wellington in lovely Aoteoroa so he got his “piss off, thanks for coming” down down. Great to have you with us Vomit and thanks for joining in the 2000th run celebrations.
Lion from Burma is also departing our shores fairly soon…again, a “piss off, thanks for coming” down down was had and thanks for all your mighty efforts in helping at Boonah.
Now, a well deserved castigatory (that means “by way of punishment”) down down for the likes of Caustic, Nasty, ShowPony, VD and Kwakka, for shortcutting the walk and going to the pub!!!
Last but not least, Rock Hard gets Prick of the Week…I fucking forget why, but he gets it anyway!!
We then had a very premature self nomination from the floor for a committee position next year…Josephine would like to take Nasty’s role of Minister for C.R.A.P as he has correctly perceived that it is a total rort and a fine excuse for sticking your nose in the trough at committee breakfasts, etc.
A reminder that the AGPU is coming up soon and those of us who have not completed 10 runs this year will be charged the higher, but still heavily subsidised fee for the night.
On that note, and still complaining about the nosh, Moonbeams brought proceedings to a close.
Next week’s run…..check the website!!
And for those of you who would like to order a blue 2000th run shirt, please see Botcho as he can get some more made up.
That’s all folks!!
Fanny Charmer …