Date: 6 th August 2018………………………….
Location: Miami …………………………………….
Right on cue, down came the rain as hashers drove to the Miami venue. While every hasher knows how important rain is at the moment, its just not needed between 5 pm and 7:30 pm on Monday nights. Much to the hare’s relief, it was just a shower in the vicinity of the trail or as one bushie described light rain on television as just angels pissing in the clouds. As usual the hare gave instructions on what the arrows/paper would look like on trail which never ceases to amaze all when really its the same shit every Monday night, year in /year out. The trail went north and then west in the vicinity of the beach and then the GC highway.
The arrows were well marked but as Ball Bag noted , not a bloody check in sight all night. Near Miami SHS, some found the trail over the GC highway while others didn’t. Sir Blackie remarked what a black night it was and decided to head home before he possibly took a fall.
It wasn’t long until all hashers were back and had a beverage in their hands and found some nibbles which were well hidden on the BBQ’s by the darkness. This was the start of a 3x1x3 menu provided by the hare. There were 3 dips , 1 pasta dish and 3 cakes to choose from. KB assisted with portion control after Sir Ferret had organised the conga line of hungry hashers banging on the plates for a feed. Swollen Colon reckoned he missed out on the rice which he had seen but was assured no one had rice with their pasta.
With the carbo loading complete, the GM called the circle and first out were the returning runners and visitors. Up stepped KB, Sir Blackie. Hot Dick and Bruce. The latter didn’t blink an eyelid even after the hash pyromaniac had exploded a banger in the vicinity of his clacker. Slug as the hare received a down down and a good run report from Two Dogs, one of the few hashers that found the whole trail. All agreed the nosh was good. In the absence of the current POW, it will be carried over by Poxy currently in FNQ.
RA Sweathog stepped up to the plate and reminded us of his fundraising rally for prostrate cancer. Ball Point also reminded us of his fund raising night for the Broadbeach School tuckshop which might be a good hash nosh venue down the track. The GM made donations to both.
Sir Ferret gave a report on the Lightning Ridge hash relay where all teams were declared dead heat joint winners. As we all know if you go touring west of the Great Divide in this country, shit can happen. Sir Ferret told that Croc had 3 experiences in his new camper loosing a bedroom window, a collapsing bike rack and wrecked electric bike after leaving the weekend relay event. Prior to that there was another minor scrape to his camper while reversing in a caravan park.
Random minor explosions from the pyromaniac and constant farting from some hasher with foul bowels were becoming a major distraction to the GM. Then the constant chatter from hashers showing no respect caused the GM to announce that he had no choice but to bring water torture back to the circle. So we have been warned, icings may be coming during future circles. Aussie was a given a yellow card and down down as an example for circle disruption.
Brewtus and Slug captured a few of these hashers in photos as they did their deeds of distraction.
Ball Bags had a crack at a few jokes which resulted in a chorus begging for the return of Iceman.
Next weeks run is the investiture of Josephine as a Knight of the hash realm. He will even have a jog before receiving his title. Hopefully Elvis will be back from the USSR to perform as the hare for the evening. No prises for guessing what will be on the nosh menu.
In a sign of solidarity, the GM announced it was a group closure to the circle. As the chorus of End of Circle rang out, there was a sigh of relief from the guests in the cabin nearest the car park who had paid top dollar for a peaceful evening listening to the gentle waves from their balcony but had to put up with constant explosions and noise from the circle.
A hasher who had consumed cheap red coloured cans of XXXX heavy beer during the evening was observed driving home north in his similar coloured car for several hundred metres in the middle of the road above the white line, maybe thinking he was still on trail. Thankfully he finally came to his senses or his passengers alerted him before the vehicle came to the attention of other road users including the local boys in blue randomly on patrol. The dash cam footage would be interesting viewing if you were coming from the opposite direction.
CIRCUMFERENCE(on secondment for a couple of weeks from AAP ROOTERS)