Date: 10th December 2018……………………..
Location: Nerang ………………………………….
As the Northern Alliance carpool arrived at the venue, Sir Rabbit looked at Sit Two Dog’ car’s GPS view of the green forest and remarked that all should have worn the infamous Mumbles Nerang Forest run T-shirts to this run. A comment that went through to the keeper but unknown to all would certainly make its relevance as the evening progressed. A good roll up of 35 hashers took final instructions from Ballpoint who advised that it was a thinking hashers run. An early stumbling block for most hashers who don’t think on runs but just follow the leader. However all seemed to be going well as the pack soon reached a drink stop of jellied lemon/lime tequila shots manned by Arse Nic. A well marked trail and plenty of natural light as noted by Sir Jo who advised that as the summer equinox is approaching it is a great time for summer hash runs, gave all plenty of confidence that this was going to be a nice cruisy walk in the park. Slug and Now Loved called out regularly to keep the pack together. As the light faded, so did the markings on the trail and the majority of hashers looked for quickest way home. However the Nerang Forest can be trap for every hasher whether a virgin or an experienced Sir and a few of the pack become unstuck and started the old running around in circles in the dark trick. It would seem that everyone sooner or later gets a taste of the legacy of Mumbles, GC Hash’s version of the Bermuda triangle when day turns to night on hash runs in the forest.
As most hashers were already chewing on their BBQ cooked chorizo and Jatz crackers washed down by lemon/lime infused Coronas, the care factor of the welfare of their fellow hashers didn’t register on their radar. A group of about 6 missing hashers eventually stumbled in , some missing some bark and others who were very dirty and sweaty headed for the eskies for some refreshments after their very unpleasant after dark experience in the forest. The main curse of Mexican Chilli Con Carne/rice was then served before the freshly made deep fried Chiros for dessert. A good start up dessert franchisee opportunity in the offering was demonstrated by the 3 Amigos Chiros mobile kitchen.
The GM announced it was circle time and an orderly group of hashers came to attention. Returning runners – Foxtrot Oscar, Mad Mike, Sir AH and Flasher each enjoyed a down down. Flasher had turned up for the run which was originally assigned to him but wasn’t available to do it. The 3 Amigos -Ballpoint/Skyhook/Arse Nic were next out as the hares. A combined delivery of a joke about a bull was given by the GM/Sir Ferret. Next entertainment act came from Rug who sang one of his family favourite songs about his sister Belinda and her association with Tequila ,Vino, Gin and Jack Daniels.
The well stocked esky of Mexican birthday beers which had been provided by Arse Nic earned him the next down down. Excel Pet’s run report was that about 6 hashers obviously didn’t think real hard on the so called thinking man’s run. As well as running, diving had featured on the trail and some of the best were from Excel Pet, Sir Botcho and Sir Two Dogs. The award for the hasher with the highest thinking IQ went to Fuller Shit who after the first drink stop had got a lift back to the bucket.
Sir Ferret was next out for a drink for being too mouthy in the circle while the GM tried to keep some sort of sensible control of proceedings and give advice about next weeks Christmas run. Maybe because Sir Ferret is not attending, he lost interest. A show of hands was asked for by the GM for others not attending. The Big O and Hot Dick advised that they will be absent also. However while this may assist with catering, it doesn’t take into account those other 10 or so other hashers who will be there next Monday but were absent from this run. Don’t forget your cash and Go Card just to cover any issues that may arise during the evening. Budds Beach is the starting venue.
Iceman had a crack at a joke about a cat but as it back fired, Miscarriage suggested with his hash name that it was appropriate for him to do a short stretch on the prepared ice. Miscarriage continued speaking about the fact that the hare had almost caused a catastrophe of losing 6 hashers by the lack of flour /markings and an investment of about 50 cents for some more flour after the final ON was all that was needed.
The GM called out Ballpoint for his co -hares failing miserably as sous chefs and presented Skyhook with his gifted copy of Harrier International for his perusal as there will be a quiz for him down the track about his knowledge of hash history. While this going on , Ballpoint was still just waiting there in the circle like a stale bottle of piss going off in the midday sun, so Carefree cleverly suggested to the GM that it was maybe time to give him his down down.
The GM’s invite to close the circle went to that rowdy hasher, Foxtrot Oscar.
Another memorable evening at the Nerang Pony Club/ Forest would not be complete with remembering those famous words of recently married Mumbles currently honeymooning with his young bride. On 24 January 2005, Mumbles set his run from this venue and it resulted in some hashers ending up at Pacific Pines. Upon hitching a ride home, he later told the circle –
” I knew where we were and where we should come out , but we weren’t where I thought I was “.
Circumference(ghost writing for Fuck All who is on tour)